Sunday, May 27, 2007

When I am an old woman I will own 10 vacuums

Maybe it is the way the simple knife glides through at the two 45 degree angles, or how the wedge is handed over without a touch, or perhaps it is admitting that transitional peaches are better than organic. Decidely, it is the way they can pronounce mame sapote with flair. Yes, I have a crush on the fruit guys at New Seasons. I can not help it. It does not matter what the fruit man du jour looks like, smells like, or sounds like. They are all so good, so sweet. Like a bite out of Taylors Gold. Each week I visit the fruit man. Mind you, I do not intend to even speak to the fruit guys, but there they are, blade in the holster waiting to cut a piece of fruit for the baby and I. Half the time no words are exchanged, a simple nod in the direction of a certain pile of fruit, or a smile to the child with me. I never think of the fruit men until I see the fruit men, then it all begins anew. Suddenly, a delicate sliver of fruit is placed in my hand, a chimoya ends up in my cart. Two minutes later and satisfied, we move on to the vegetables and the dairy.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Differences: In a nutshell

At what point did I become less fun and more practical, or worse yet was I ever fun? I do not possess catlike qualities. Shimmy through a crack in a door? No. Jumping over a wide space in hopes of getting across? Only in an emergency. Chasing a mammal? heh heh, big no. Curiosity is not on the top of my character list. After mulling this over for most of the day I realized that my curiosity differs from others. Okay, so I could really only compare to a 2 year old, but still....Children are extremely curious. Ever notice how often they can check gravity? A LOT. Gravity involving water, food, balls, grass, and so on. Jack in the Box's and Peek a Boo were created for a reason! To note, Jack in the Boxes freaked me out. The anticipation was really a challenge for me, and I like surprises. Physical curiousity is the most common form according to me (and probably "they" would say so too. Ha!) Opening a shut door, climbing a tree, going a new route and so on. I, on the other hand, am mentally curious. ie: a daydreamer, a romantic, "lives in a fantasy world." When I was in college I read my perfect bumper sticker * Not all Wanderers are Lost.* I am far more curious about the couple seated next to me in a restaurant, or the person running on my route, or the squirrel girl.

She was at a bus stop on a busy busline. Longish brown skirt, coat, leggings, brown leather-ish boots, squirrel hat. Yes, perched upon her head framing her pixie face was a knitted squirrel hat. This was not a stylish childish statement like the cute exchange students in kneehighs, cheerleader skirts and Hello Kitty backpacks. This was full on I am the nut, here is the squirrel. There was a bit of an edge to her that gave a boundary to all living things. In other words, if you got too close, the squirrel would jump off her head onto it and the strings would wrap around and choke you. I was so curious about her that to this day I still think of her (obviously)

To make myself feel better about being practical and not uber curious I told myself that it is a good thing to balance out everyone else. So if you are dining with me and ordering wildly off the menu and I get what I *always* get, rest assured I can find great pleasure in the other possibilities presented to me just a table away.

A Sea of Thoughts

Before I had a chance to unclasp my grip, we all spun and went under. Down and down we spiraled letting the current of 100 bodies take us down. Fortunately I have a good lung capacity so I was able to look around and make sure the others did, too. All I saw were shirttails floating and the circle of people going under. Finally I broke free and kicked up, my heart racing. As I surfaced, I decided that this was enough. It was time to get the group organized and do something else. Where was the supervision? Was anyone in charge, or were we all in charge of ourselves? I did not like it and wanted out. Running around collecting my friends felt fruitless, yet at least I was trying, right? A loud exploding sound woke me up. I can see how the sound of gunfire or bombs cand send someone into a panic attack, heart attack, or a bowel attack. The neighbors car obviously shot something out it's tank and brought me back to "reality."

As I laid there getting my bearings, I remembered the dream I was in the minute prior. I told myself to tell the kids that if a bunch of people want to go under water, don't be dragged down without a big breath and be responsible for their own body. Also, to not be in a situation that has potential for lethal repercussions. I actually became more scared of the inevitable time when my children will be making decisions on their own and going places that I don't know of.

I am sure it will sound really weird when I tell them the deep water warning, but at least I put the bug in their ear. At least I tried.

Sunday, May 20, 2007


My dad is a smart man. Growing up, there were many "rule #1" moments. He was usually able to catch us before we broke the unknown rule. If, by chance, we had already committed the crime, we were quickly set right. For example, "rule #1" was to buckle your seatbelt before the car moved. Another- "rule #1" hand the scissors so the reciever could grasp the handle, not the blades." There were so many rules, and *all* were #1. Over the years, I have learned some rules of my own.

Rule #1: do not state that you'll never do something you haven't actually been faced with. The day will come that the baby leaves the house in pajamas, or galoshes and shorts, or even a runny nose. Saying never will inevitably come to bite you in the butt.

Rule #1: "They" will never be discovered. "They" say that chocolate does not have it's own section in the food pyramid. "They" say that children need a bedtime routine _every_ night. I honestly think there is a devil they and an angel they.

Rule #1: Because I said so.

Rule #1: Be the one to load the Goodwill bags into the car. If you leave this job to others, well, someone else might be walking around with your favorite cardigan.

Rule #1: If it feels weird it probably is. If it feels right it probably is. Make good choices.

Rule #1: Being polite always works in your favor.

Rule #1: Hindsight is pretty clear.

Rule #1: Don't settle. Unless it's down.

Rule #1: Chocolate chip cookies cure everything.

I am sure there are more so as they come to me I will post them.

Why is it that we are so quick to judge on things that we have yet to face? For example, before children I was convinced, *convinced* I say that my children would never go to the store in pajamas, or with a sticky face, or goofy outfits. Okay, so my first child followed my exemplary attention to grocery store preparation but I am the first to admit that there is no crime in taking babies out in there pajamas. I say as long as the diaper is not sagging underneath then go for it. I have been known to put clean pajamas on for reasons I am not sure of. Likely it is some hidden fear that we are breaking rule #1. So with this I leave you, take a walk in on someone elses route. Be extra nice. Do not be unnecessary.

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Small Steps versus Giant Leaps

We began moving forward before our "existance" in the world. It was such a natural journey simply guided by a single path. Is it amazing to think that to this day, this moment, we are still sensitive to our surroundings and we react in ways similar to our entrance to the world? The only difference is that now we have past experiences to mold how we express ourselves. I often wonder if I freaked out the moment I was born, as I really do not like loud noises or bright lights. However, I do not mind being cold. Did the people that love firecrackers, sirens, and drums respond intrigued and without a cry to the noise but rather to the cold air? I am not one to change my preferences to certain stimuli, but I am adaptable and because of it am capable of changing how I respond and deal with situations. I am moving forward.